Smelly pie

From USAFA Folklore

Smelly Pie is a simple method of nuking and a good way to waste food in a hillarious way. Normally, the victim is a new freshman or someone who has very poor situational awareness. On days where pie is served, specifically pie with lots of whipped cream and a gooey, sticky center comprised of something like strawberries, upperclassmen usually start gesturing, winking, or whispering to each other to get the attention of the upperclassman sitting closest to a smack. Sometimes one or two upperclassmen will verbally object saying, "No, come on, I want to eat it," or "That's cruel, don't do it," or "Don't waste food." This makes successful completion all the more sweet, since the smacks should catch a clue that something is about to happen. After some chuckles, the upperclassman next to the smacks will pick up the pie and smell it, saying "Hmm, this pie smells a little funny." The phrasing could range from smelling good, bad, or weird, but it doesn't matter as long as it works. The upperclassman will say to the smack, "Here, does this smell funny to you?" When the smack leans over the pie to smell it, the upperclassman plants the pie firmly in the face of the dimwitted victim. Laughter ensues as the smack is now covered in pie. Good gooey centers can sometimes temporary stick the eyes shut, leading some smacks needing an escort to the bathroom to wash the glue-like substance off their faces. A wet napkin also works well with cleanup.

Mitchell Hall workers have, on occasion, tried to forbid the practice because of the wasteful nature of the activity. Sometimes the table commandant will get reprimanded in addition to the person who put the pie into the face of the victim if a member of permanent party is nearby. Other times, a short scolding results with a pie embargo placed on that table for a few weeks. The smelly pie is always worth a laugh, especially if someone had it coming.

Those that don't fall for it are heralded as smarter than the average smack, but do on occasion get pied anyway later when they aren't paying attention, depending on how assinine the surrounding people want to be. Small pie fights usually result from a successful hit, and can occur anyway between freshman who don't understand the rules and just pie each other at random. Whipped cream can get everywhere and on many people in these little spats. More often than not though, a good tasting pie usually ends up eaten instead of worn by some unsuspecting smack.