Saturday Morning Inspection

From USAFA Folklore

The Saturday Morning Inspection (SAMI) is a stringent room and personal appearance inspection conducted on Saturday mornings. The room may be inspected by a series of officials, including the squadron leadership, then the group leadership, then the wing leadership, as well as any visiting officials. At least in the 70s, the SAMI was differentiated from the less-formal AMI by having the bed made with a "dust collar" - 12 inches of exposed bedsheet, and the top blanket and sheet folded down with another 12 inches of "collar". Additionally, the dresser drawers had to be opened 3 inches for the top drawer, 9 inches for the middle, and 12 inches for the bottom. All lights in the room were to be on, and the closet doors and the medicine cabinets on either side of the sink were opened. The floor was highly buffed with automotive paste wax, at least until the great "Fire in the Hall" and subsequent wax purge of 1974. (See Buffer races for details.)

[edit] Passing the time during a SAMI

Cadets were required to stand at parade rest, in silence, for an hour or more between the times the room is actually inspected. Thus, cadets get very bored and find ways to pass the time:

• Prior to the inspection, collect some pennies and put them in your pocket. While standing waiting for your room to get inspected, throw, roll, or fling them into the room across the hall. Also works well with rubber bands.
• Do the same thing, with a super bouncy ball. See how long you can get it to bounce around in there.
• While they are inspecting the room across from yours, make faces at the cadets in there while the inspectors' backs are turned. Try to get the other cadets to lose their bearing.
• Farting right before the inspector arrived was a good way to ensure he wouldn't hang around your room long enough to find many discrepancies. Obviously, this plan often backfired.
• A highly successful tactic I practiced was displaying detailed model aircraft and armor. Inspectors wasted time gawking and then hurried to the next room. Quatermass '76

[edit] Trivia

• On 1 February 2003, the Cadet Wing was standing in a SAMI while the Space Shuttle Columbia disintegrated on re-entry. Cadets were permitted to turn on their televisions and watch the news during the SAMI.